Fun ways to phone in a pizza order
- If using a touch-tone phone, press random numbers while ordering. Ask the person taking the order to stop doing that.
- Make up a credit card name. Ask if they accept it.
- Order a Big Mac Extra Value Meal.
- Terminate the call with, “Remember, we never had this conversation.”
- Tell the order-taker that a rival pizza place is on the other line and you’re going with the lowest bidder.
- Answer their questions with questions.
- Say hello, act stunned for five seconds, then behave as if they called you.
- Make a list of exotic cuisines. Order them as toppings.
- Change your accent every three seconds.
- Order 52 pepperoni slices prepared in a fractal pattern as follows from an equation you are about to dictate. Ask if they need paper.
- If they repeat the order to make sure they have it right, say “OK. That’ll be $10.99; please pull up to the first window.”
- Rent a pizza.
- Ask if you get to keep the pizza box. When they say yes, heave a sigh of relief.
- Ask that your pizza be “shaken, not stirred.”
- Eliminate verbs from your speech.
- When they say “What would you like?” say, “Huh? Oh, you mean now.”
- Ask to see a menu.
- Ask what topping goes best with well-aged Chardonnay.
- Order a slice, not a whole pizza.
- Order two toppings, then say, “No, they’ll start fighting.”
- Learn to properly pronounce the ingredients of a Twinkie. Ask that these be included in the pizza.
- Ask if the pizza is organically grown.
- Ask about pizza maintenance and repair.
- State your order and say that’s as far as this relationship is going to get.
- When listing toppings you want on your pizza, include another pizza as a topping.
- Put them on hold.
- Make the first topping you order mushrooms. Make the last thing you say “No mushrooms, please.” Hang up before they have a chance to respond.
- When you’re given the price, haggle.
- Order a one-inch pizza.
- Order term life insurance.
- When they say “Will that be all?”, snicker and say “We’ll find out, won’t we?”
- Dance all around the word “pizza.” Avoid saying it at all costs. If the order-taker says it, say “Please don’t mention that word.”
- Order a steamed pizza.
(I found this somewhere on the Internet, so I take no credit for it! ;))
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Haven’t seen this one in a long time. So true!
McFly said this on January 25, 2010 at 4:11 pm |
have 15 pizzas delivered to your neighbor who keeps stealing your Sunday paper.
Matthew Ryan said this on January 25, 2010 at 11:02 pm |
good one!!
Cindy-Cin said this on February 3, 2010 at 1:59 pm |
Funny! (Hey, I’m right below Cin!)
Deb P. said this on February 16, 2010 at 2:03 pm |
that’s a good one!
Tom Harris said this on April 27, 2010 at 11:49 am |